Reading

I've been trying to read A New Earth - it's slow going. Lala takes up a lot of time and what little time I have left over, I use to keep up the grading (I really have to stop assigning so much work - it's such a pain the ass to grade).

Anyhoo, one thing that has stayed with me so far is the idea that life is suffering. I don't mean that in a "oh whoa is me" kinda way, but rather that things aren't going work out like I've planned. It isn't meant to be easy and sometimes bad stuff happens. It's like saying why not me? I mean, would I really be able to choose someone else to carry my burdens? And whose would I pick up? Nothing is perfect and I have been blessed with some many things that others pray for every day.

That's part of the reason why I love reading other people's blogs. It makes me feel like I'm not alone in this journey - other people struggle and they succeed or they don't, but there life doesn't end. Neither will mine. I watch Lala play on the floor and think to myself that she is the most beautiful baby there ever was and I hope that when the time comes for her to go home we both can handle it and that she will remember the love and safety that she felt here. I'm sure it will hurt like heck, but I know I can carry my own burdens and my life will go on.