OMG! OMG!

Could this be it?

I just got a call from the placement co-ordinator asking if I was interested in having a newborn infant placed with me... one that will probably be going to termination (this is the ONLY time anyone has EVER said this me!) and, in fact, the adoption worker had suggested my name as a placement option.

I am quitely freaking out.

The infant is currently in the hospital, possibly in the PICU... but the PC didn't call it that and really, he was talking too fast for me to get all the information written down. There will be a meeting with the CW to go over all the information, hopefully before the placement? OMG... I really know nothing about this child! (this would be the freaking out part!)

Can I handle what is going on with this child? This totally changes my plans for the next year for work - as in, there is no way I can do National Boards. Luckily, something has kept me from filling out all the paperwork and paying for anything. I wonder if I can get a refund on the money I've spent for co-hort class, even though it started already? Will I be able to get back into the pro-cert program? I have to do something in order to keep my job... and option two is waaaaayyyy easier.

Where am I going to fit another crib? Where am I going to get another crib? Shit, I have to buy another car seat? I wonder the Cuddler can move into the other car seat I have? I think he's still too little... ok, just checked and he's just made it past the cut off (or past it depending on who is doing the weighing). Can I do too babies? What about the dog? She is not going to be happy. I should probably clean up the living room (or giant toy box as it should be known). What if the baby needs a hermetically sealed house? Seriously, I am not that clean. What if the baby has to be fed through a ng tube or something every two hours? Where does one even find day care for such a child? Should I take materity leave? I have like a month of sick time built up... I wonder if I can use it? I may have an excuse to buy that minivan now!

There are about a million things running through my head at the moment and I can NOT reach my mother by phone! She is my medical encyclopedia and I can't even figure out which unit the baby is in because the PC doesn't use the same terminology as they do on TV.