This morning my phone rang around 8.30am. I thought it was my mother calling to let me know that she was leaving for the drive here, but the caller-ID showed a strange local number. It was the cuddler’s BM. She was calling to ask if her cell phone had been placed in the cuddler’s sack and brought to me after his last visit.
After reading about the BM experiences of others, I’m always a bit leery of contact. What if I say the wrong thing? Reveal something I shouldn’t… etc. It’s a difficult place to stand, but I guess it’s something I have to do for the cuddler. We both live in the same small town/rural area. As I mentioned before, it would be very simple to find out any information she wanted to know about me – we have acquaintances in common – and she probably does have a lot of information about me already.
Once I ascertained that I didn’t have her cell phone, she asked me if I was going to adopt her son. Since that’s been the plan all along, I was a little confused as to why she was asking, but I guess in her position perhaps she feels like she may not have gotten the full truth. We also talked about the open adoption agreement and hopefully she will sign off on everything next week.
We talked a lot about the cuddler and I got some information about his biological father. Apparently, the cuddler’s advanced sports skills are genetic, descended from a high school sports star who was pretty much great at every sport. My parents will happy to know that he’ll probably be a natural fisherman once he’s old enough to be safe around fish hooks. (I won’t be taking him as my own abiding fear of fishhooks and boat propellers will probably push me over the OCD edge. Yes, I’m terrified of boat propellers.) I probably should have asked about hereditary medical conditions, but I guess they’ll be time enough to ask later.
It’s hard to define how this relationship will work. I wonder if it will ever be comfortable or morph into something completely unknown. Right now, it’s just odd.
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